The Last Hoorah

Have you ever thought of what your last words would be to someone, someone who has made an impact on your life, someone special? Well this can relate to people who may be dying, or letting go of a significant other and ending a relationship. Both are different, both are difficult. I'm in both right now.

Even though it was not my relationship, I am still the advice-giver and somehow have a part in the situation. It's always hard to end things because you don't want to feel alone. It really is hard to end it, but most of the time it's for the best. If it's "all about how people treat others," then that includes how they treat you (the other person in the relationship)! I hate seeing my friends hurt and unhappy, so I fear for the future significant others who treat them poorly. Sometimes I just think it would be common sense, but that's an outsider's perspective because I really don't have any emotional attachment to the actual relationship.. just what I see and hear.

While dealing with the relationship drama, I received a phone call. I had about a couple of minutes to think about what my last words would be to the someone who impacted my life, my mother's life, and my grandparents's, along with the rest of my family. Hiboo is her name, and she plays her own game. She's the kind of person who does what she wants, her opinions are widely known, and she'll talk your ear off in a heartbeat. She's kind of a celebrity. Nelly, Cher, Oprah, Beyonce, Hiboo. A Lockhart native, small town woman, she has lived quite an intriguing life. And she is family; we may not be blood, but we're still kin. That's how it works here in the South, and Lockhart, South Carolina is the epitome of the way the South works. I went this past summer with some family for a visit, and once we got there the whole town knew we were back. A slightly abandoned mill town, Hiboo ran the place. She's been on the radio and everybody knows her. There are so many stories that won't be forgotten. But back to the point. In the minute that you have to speak to a not-so-responsive woman laying in a hospital bed, what do you say?

I've seen too many people around me dying, specifically lately, and I don't think I can take much more. She's the last member of the Lockhart gang that I've grown going to visit. They helped raise my mom and aunt when they lived there, and they've all been part of our family since before then. We've spent Christmases there and always make stops along the way up to Greenville, etc.

I just hate every moment of thinking that that was the last time I'll ever talk to Hiboo. At least I made her laugh.

God Bless her!

Clemson Greeks

Clemson Greek Life is being run to the ground. Collectively, we as greeks have done so much for Clemson and the community, made above average GPAs, and continue to have a good time. Unfortunately, we are constantly under a microscope. Between President Barker and the Board of Trustees breathing down our backs and DiSabatino of Student Affairs in our faces, we have become a force to be reckoned with and stopping all social activity is what they have concluded will solve the problems of student safety. Maybe the percentage of accidents are higher within the Greek Community, but have they thought about unreported incidents within the non-Greek Community? This has happened since the beginnings of Clemson's social atmosphere. People do not know their limits. Underage drinking starts in high-school, how do they honestly expect to stop it when students live in apartments by themselves. We all need to learn how to make better decisions. And most of what has happened at Clemson between the deaths, DUI's, and hospital visits were from individuals' poor decisions. It is unfortunate, as well, that with all of Clemson's administrative creativity that they decided to put all greek life on Social Probation. What is this, Animal House? I feel like I'm on Double Secret Probation here.

Animal house is a stereotypical vision of greek life. Greek Life here at Clemson is not like that at all. We are fairly well reserved, compared to most other campuses, and we contribute a lot of money and time to the community. Greek Life as a whole has a strong presence on campus, and I would hate to see it become a puppet show. The safety of Clemson students is a major priority, yes, but we are not idiots here. We work, we play. Some play harder then others, but where have you not seen that? We do not even make the cut for the top party school list anymore. We have settled down and worked hard, harder than most others on campus, and now we are rewarded by being put on "secret probation."

I am really surprised that the boys are still building their Homecoming floats on Bowman this week, now in the pouring rain, and that the girls remained in the Homecoming pageants, as well as providing skit entertainment for Tigerama. If they wanted to make a statement to Clemson and rally for more Alumni support, this would be the week to do it. We are learning about our probations on a week-by-week basis. Let's hope it does not get as bad as bad could be. I would really like to see my tuition and dues be used for my personal benefit. We're talking out-of-state tuition and hundreds of dollars for sorority dues. It is painful watching such wonderful people being treated and tried for such things as "fun." Fun doesn't always have to end so terribly. Maybe it's more education and risk management meetings that will help. Maybe it should be that you should BYOB to fraternity parties on the weekends. Maybe students shouldn't have to tell what Greek Organizations they are a part of to police or doctors at hospitals.

Greek life coming together needs to show our unity for our brothers and sisters: past, present, and future. We need to work together against what will run us to the ground, turn us to dust, then sweep us out the door.

I joined the sorority that my Aunt chartered on Clemson's campus, and I do not want to let her down. I do not want to let my founders down. I do not want to let myself down. I have respect for myself, my sisters, Greek Life, and Clemson. But the way Clemson keeps pushing us makes me quickly lose respect for the institution I thought I knew so well, and loved so much.

Waiting..

"Guys and girls just can't be friends." What kind of advice is that? I've seen that on television and I've heard that from mostly guys. But is it true? I question this because I do have a lot of guy friends and I think that's great. But when it comes to best friends, pressure, etc. What really goes on? I think having guys as friends works out. Maybe there are times where it's not the "just friends" mentality, but it can go back and forth. It's funny how that happens. As long as the two of you are okay with it, and don't listen to others' opinions all of the time, I think it works out quite nicely.

Baseball's Never Been Hotter.. with the Jacksonville Suns!

So since I complained about being bored this summer, a lot has been going on! It's a little crazy here in the life of Ashley now. I mean, I've gone from potential bummer-summer to a bomb-dot-com break! If everything can go as "planned," then I'll be a world traveler by mid June!

Let's start with a couple of days ago.. with Thursday. Thirsty Thursday, to be exact was Lindsey's 21st birthday! I spent the ENTIRE afternoon at lunch and back at the dealership with dad picking out a car, well picking out options. It's down to a Tahoe and an SRX now!

Thursday night to Monday night has worn me out, and today has been my re-coop day! Thursday I met up with friends at the Suns baseball game for Lindsey's birthday, and everyone and their moms, literally I saw my friends' moms, were there. It was good to finally see so many people home, and I even ran into my brothers. After the game we went out to celebrate Lindsey's birthday, and apparently she had enough fun to not make it out after the game, so I went on to celebrate Zach's 21st at midnight, since his birthday was Friday! Friday was also Nick's baccalaureate. So we went out for that, and then to Ruth's Chris for Zach's birthday with the family. I'm talkin.. our close family, then Zach's dad and aunts on his side, then his mom's mom and sister. What interesting conversations we had at dinner!

Sunday I spent the day at the beach with Mama, partially for her birthday, partially for a break! It was the most gorgeous day yet, so well worth it.. and we didn't burn! I went to lunch with her at La Nop for her birthday on Monday and then dinner with her at the Brick tonight! Monday night was Zach's party and some of his fraternity brothers came in town- so of course it was fun! We took a party bus to Outback Crabshack for lots of seafood, beer, and Jimmy Buffett tunes! Then we rode out to the towncenter to go to Whiskey River, one of the new bars in town. Needless to say, the entire night was fun and I've been recovering all day.

I've also been planning my potential spontaneous trip to see Caroline in Brussels, and se Bruges and London as well! Hopefully it all works out, and I'll update soon! What a time to go.. 21 years old and free-spirited.. that's me. And I'm hoping that I'll have no chains to bear, holding me back!

XOXO

Ashley

Summer Bummin'

Alright, it's come to the point in my life when I don't necessarily look all too forward to summer. Coming home is great for a while, but it gets to be pretty boring. The adventures kind of fade until I get used to the home-life again. And Mom has to get used to me being here, too. It's a weird time so far.

Today's a good example; I was by myself all day. I had a dentist appointment, and thank God I didn't have any cavities, but after that 11am appointment that I thought was at 11:30am, I had to fill my day with trying to figure out something to do. Not everyone's home yet, and I could have gone to the pool to work on my tan.. but, well, that wasn't quite intriguing today. I instead went to the Super Target, where they did not have what I was looking for- a cooler of all things. I'm going to paint a cooler for my brother for his 21st! I'm hoping that's a good idea, but we'll see if he likes it. It's popular in Clemson, so maybe it'll catch on in Auburn. I haven't seen one from Auburn, yet.

I have less that a week now to do that, his birthday is Friday. And my other brother's graduation is this weekend, too. I should be excited, but it's going to be interesting. And I've got to figure out what to get him, too. Probably an Auburn bowtie. We'll see what I end up getting though.

After I looked around for the cooler, I decided I was too hungry to go elsewhere, and I picked up lunch at the new bbq place in town. It was pretty good. I brought it home and sat on the couch, watched more television this afternoon than I did all semester combined, and chilled with Toby- my dog, until Mom came home. I checked facebook a few times, and I joined a group: "Summer you've lost your charm already, I'd rather be in CLEMSON."

And that's when I realized.. it's true. I'm over the summer already, and I'm wishing I had just gotten an internship in Clemson. And that's when I started thinking.. I don't think I can come back here after college. I might be miserable. It's always been between home and South Carolina, and South Carolina happens to be winning the race now. It's really hard to think about leaving Clemson, too.. you know, graduating? It's going to be this feeling.. but ten times worse!

I know I'll be excited about some job that I'll hopefully get, but I'm just deteriorating now. Going from four roommates to just me and Mom, who isn't home until about 5 everyday. All my friends being in a five mile radius, to the biggest city land-wise in the United States. My internship this summer is kind of the same as last summer, but hopefully will keep me busier this time around. I'm kind of wishing, also, that I would have just gone back to camp!

I think, and hope, that it will get better- my internship starts not this, but the next weekend. And I'm trying to figure out when I can make it back to Clemson/Greenville/Camp this summer.

Until then.. I've got to find things to keep me busy, or I swear I'll go insane. It's weird, too because my high school friends just graduated college, and most of my other friends will be working non-stop or out of town.

Football season's sounding good.. bring on Senior year (and a half)!

xoxo

Ashley

Stressed is Desserts Spelled Backwards

You know when there's that one thing you've got to do, and you just don't want to do it? It's like you can do anything in the world, literally ANYTHING.. besides that one thing. But that one thing just keeps lingering on, you just push it aside when you really just need to buckle down and get it done. Well that's me tonight, folks.

And that one thing.. happens to be studying for finals!

Not quite the best thing to procrastinate as a college student. It's what.. the third or fourth time in the passed week that I've seen 5am.. BEFORE I've gone to bed. "Going to bed is overrated," "You can sleep when you're dead," "Bedtime in college is really just another long nap in the day.." I've heard it and said it all! But it's getting pretty ridiculous. Today, my roommate and I were planning on waking up EARLY.. like 8:30-9am and getting breakfast. It turned into waking up at 11:30am and getting brunch at Bojangles, then heading to Starbucks for the rest of the afternoon where we studied.

But all the while, our "studying" also consisted of people watching, eavesdropping, facebooking, side chatting, and tweeting.. I like to call it incredible multi-tasking, especially since I got my hardest studying time in there. We took a break and I went over to my friend's apartment to get some outside time for about an hour, then me and my roommate went to dinner at Mellow Mushroom, then tried to decide where to go next..

It is Sunday. And we do follow blue laws and early closing times on Sundays.. everywhere. And it's not like we were about to go anywhere near the library. The library, I like to call Club Coop. And it is a zoo around exams! I got to take a power nap, and we "googled" places to go, and where did we end up.. none other than.. back at Starbucks! Only until 11pm, and I still hadn't finished studying. No one even knows how to study for this exam tomorrow anymore anyways..! And with the random things I've found myself doing other than studying today and yesterday.. looking up paint colors for our room, talking about nothing, trying to make ourselves laugh, people watching, hair-braiding, watching a movie, playing Scrabble, chatting on facebook, and thinking about life past college (a whole other story).. dealing with boys, and figuring out this summer, thinking how I'm going to pay my parking tickets before they put them on my tuition, and getting pumped for next week at home with my roommate.. it's been an interesting weekend!

So I think I'm going to bed/ nap for an hour and a half, and hope not to fall asleep during my exam at 8am! Beauty rest can come with surgery, right? HA.

XOXO

Leavin' the DRAMA for your mama

Watching the movie The Holiday, I wish I could just get away sometimes. Drama arises and the main character girls flee. That is not always the case, however, we do live in the real world. And in this reality, we are all forced to deal with drama. It's everywhere and, unfortunately, it's been the girls who take the blame.. we start it and always have some of it.. and always seem to be dealing with it. And I've learned over the past 21 years of my life that running from drama never solves anything. We've got to put our big-girl panties on and deal with anything and everything that comes our way, and you never know what it's going to be next.

When you are put in a position to solve or deal with drama, and you run from it or avoid it, you are just creating more. Yes, it's unintentional, but it's still drama. Leaving people out of things, being too inclusive, making decisions, etc. These are all just the day-to-day dramatics.

I've tried to stay out of it, I've thought that I could be drama-free. It's impossible. And it's a distraction. Just a distraction from everything. And I think 2 weeks away from it all, to find the man of my dreams, like in the movie, just might help.

Instead, I'll be going home after school. And I'm bringing my awesome roommate with me! She's put things into perspective, she's made me laugh, she's listened and been there for me all year, and helped me deal with drama. Hopefully I've been there for her as much as she's been there for me all year. The week at home will consist of going to the beach, checking out the TPC, going to Tim McGraw with Lady A, and hopefully having the boys come with us! So far, I'm viewing this weekend as our vacation away from it all.. just before graduation, and just what we need after a tiring year in Clemson!

So kind of like The Holiday, we'll be high-tailing it out of town, but we're headed to Jacksonville, and we'll be back in a week. It'll be rewarding and relaxing.. and I CAN'T WAIT!