Today's a good example; I was by myself all day. I had a dentist appointment, and thank God I didn't have any cavities, but after that 11am appointment that I thought was at 11:30am, I had to fill my day with trying to figure out something to do. Not everyone's home yet, and I could have gone to the pool to work on my tan.. but, well, that wasn't quite intriguing today. I instead went to the Super Target, where they did not have what I was looking for- a cooler of all things. I'm going to paint a cooler for my brother for his 21st! I'm hoping that's a good idea, but we'll see if he likes it. It's popular in Clemson, so maybe it'll catch on in Auburn. I haven't seen one from Auburn, yet.
I have less that a week now to do that, his birthday is Friday. And my other brother's graduation is this weekend, too. I should be excited, but it's going to be interesting. And I've got to figure out what to get him, too. Probably an Auburn bowtie. We'll see what I end up getting though.
After I looked around for the cooler, I decided I was too hungry to go elsewhere, and I picked up lunch at the new bbq place in town. It was pretty good. I brought it home and sat on the couch, watched more television this afternoon than I did all semester combined, and chilled with Toby- my dog, until Mom came home. I checked facebook a few times, and I joined a group: "Summer you've lost your charm already, I'd rather be in CLEMSON."
And that's when I realized.. it's true. I'm over the summer already, and I'm wishing I had just gotten an internship in Clemson. And that's when I started thinking.. I don't think I can come back here after college. I might be miserable. It's always been between home and South Carolina, and South Carolina happens to be winning the race now. It's really hard to think about leaving Clemson, too.. you know, graduating? It's going to be this feeling.. but ten times worse!
I know I'll be excited about some job that I'll hopefully get, but I'm just deteriorating now. Going from four roommates to just me and Mom, who isn't home until about 5 everyday. All my friends being in a five mile radius, to the biggest city land-wise in the United States. My internship this summer is kind of the same as last summer, but hopefully will keep me busier this time around. I'm kind of wishing, also, that I would have just gone back to camp!
I think, and hope, that it will get better- my internship starts not this, but the next weekend. And I'm trying to figure out when I can make it back to Clemson/Greenville/Camp this summer.
Until then.. I've got to find things to keep me busy, or I swear I'll go insane. It's weird, too because my high school friends just graduated college, and most of my other friends will be working non-stop or out of town.
Football season's sounding good.. bring on Senior year (and a half)!
xoxo
Ashley
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